I Show Up For Me
I’ve been asked two questions more often than not lately. Now that I am writing more consistently than ever and edging closer to the publishing of my first book, I am beginning to carve out a place for myself and my words. I’m learning who I am and why I write. These two questions have come from family, friends, and strangers.
How do you do it?
Why do you do it?
Writing has been healing for me. In sharing some of my deepest pains and the ebbs and flows of my life’s journey, I have started to see glimpses of God in each part. Shimmers of hope remind me that I have never once been alone.
I write only by and with strength from God. Looking back at my life hasn’t been easy. There have been some painful moments. Some hard lessons to learn. I’ve said goodbye to some of my favorite people entirely too soon. But even amidst all of the pain I know one thing to be true-God has been with me carrying me through each step.
Only by God’s grace and mercy, I am who I am today. When I was too weak, God strengthened me. When I was too sick, God provided care for me. When I couldn’t see anything positive, God filled my life with all of the joy and love I never knew I needed.
I have learned the importance of sharing my story. I share it with the prayer that even if God only uses it to impact one life, then that is enough. God can work miracles with the most painful parts of our lives. He can change someone’s life by using pieces of our story if we are willing, to be honest about who we are and where we’ve been.
I keep showing up to my writing for me. The more I show up and remain consistent, the less likely I am to fall prey to the enemy who is trying to take over my life. When I am most weak emotionally and mentally, then I am a target. I have learned this over the course of many years, it was not something I learned overnight.
I’ve learned that if I want to grow, I have to be willing to do some hard work. Writing is healing. I write words that I myself need to hear. I challenge myself to see situations as they are but I work to see God’s Hand in each one. Guiding me through, carrying me when I’m too weak, and opening my eyes to something good in it, even if it is small.
Perhaps your own story has been filled with some painful moments and/or difficult encounters. If so, you understand how hard it can be to show up for the simple things. Adding a battle with anxiety and depression only heightens the struggle.
I pray that you will sense God with you, even right now. Know that He is walking with you and if things feel too heavy, He may just be carrying you until you have the strength to stand. Just know that God promises never to leave us or fail us. Your story is just as important as mine. Don’t be afraid to share it. You may speak words of wisdom to someone that may mean more than anything to them.
Psalm 56 (CSB)
Be gracious to me, God, for a man is trampling me; he fights and oppresses me all day long. My adversaries trample me all day, for many arrogantly fight against me.
When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?
They twist my words all day long; all their thoughts against me are evil. They stir up strife, they lurk, and they watch my steps while they wait to take my life. Will they escape in spite of such sin? God, bring down the nations in wrath.
You yourself have recorded my wanderings. Put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book? Then my enemies will retreat on the day when I call. This I know: God is for me.
In God, whose word I praise, in the Lord, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mere humans do to me?
I am obligated by vows to you, God; I will make my thanksgiving sacrifices to you. For you rescued me from death, even my feet from stumbling, to walk before God in the light of life.
